Entries by Joan H

Grief Breaks Down

“I thought,” she said passionately. “‘Mother f%*kr, I can’t even kill myself because my life insurance lapsed!’” Then we burst into laughter. It was after one of those breaking points. We were talking about an incident of the week prior. We were on the phone, she lives hundreds of miles away from me, when she announced that her […]

Change. Of Pace.

I have to dare myself to do things differently. The dare is to not go into a long narrative of my linear thinking processes, the cathartic inner voice to written dialogue meant to share just how I step from here into there, or there into here, and eventually around to now for ahead. From wonder […]

Afterwords to Christmas Grief

We are almost through the always tough holiday season that begins at Halloween into a New Year. I’m sharing my Christmas morning breakfast table… Leftover sushi and fried eggs. Empty chairs. My Charlie Brown Christmas Tree is the only decoration in the house, finally brought off the shelf a few days earlier, two branches fallen […]

Time of Grief: Seasons and Cycles

I’m pondering cycles this morning along with the Autumnal equinox. This is a day of balance: an equal time of light and dark given our perspective of Earth to Sun. My ruminations arise from mindfulness and meditation, both which attune to the present moment. These practices take cue from the natural world, for sure. Being […]

Energy Flows

Decades ago, after the birth of my daughter, I engaged in the first of my how to workout at home activity. It was a VHS tape to “walk off weight.” In the 45-minute daily regimen the happy, energetic leader would proclaim as the scenery out her staged window would change to rain: “no matter what […]

Grief Hope: Possibilities Exist!

A New Year offers the opportunity for reflection, forgiveness and growth. It is a time to step into the wants, what ifs and direction for the future. For me, January 1, 2016 is the day I become visible again. I have walked across another significant metaphorical loss bridge in my life. I have gained unexpected […]

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